I sometimes wish that life could be idealistically simple and plain. That one's wish was one's thought beforehand, that one's thought became one's action. I sometimes wish that I could indulge in doing nothing, just enjoying the fleeting moment, the warm saturday morning, without feeling the guilt that came with it. I sometimes wish that friends did not fall out or grow apart as most friends do. I wish that with every passing second I am alive I could feel complete and utter joy that I am so. I wish that I could say truthfully that I am getting all out of life that I was meant to. I sometimes wish that love was not futile in effort, unspoken in yearning, unignited in passion. I sometimes wish that every day was an epiphany, a discovery of something I did not before know. I sometimes wish that I did not care for earthly wants; material things. I wish that everybody felt the same. I sometimes wish I did not feel so lacking when standing amongst those more accomplished than myself, I sometimes wish I could stand shoulder to shoulder with them. I sometimes wish I could tell myself I am doing all I can in life, that no resource within me has gone to waste. I wish I could implant constant happiness in my heart and the hearts of others, I wish I could recall the innocence of the fourth grade playground. I wish I was still there.

I sometimes wish I could tell myself that I am truly happy, and know in my heart that it was the truth.